It's Late

It's 10:59 pm. I'm still wearing my scrubs. I haven't taken my shoes off since I got home from work six hours ago. I ate too much ice cream after dinner, and I'm having trouble finding the perfect couch for a house we're not buying for another 8 months, and not living in for another year. Felicity told me today that she no longer loves sandwiches or pink. Xander has started calling everybody "werewolf" because he gets in trouble when he uses the word "poo-poo". Between mouthfuls David raved about dinner, which makes me feel like I got a merit badge on my wife sash. Today I wore my new glasses -

- and automatically raised my IQ by two percent, which ironically is the exact percentage Xander will lose by being on his anti-seizure medication for the next two years. I guess it all really does balance out in the end.

It is now 11:13 pm. My children are sleeping, sweaty and sweet, and my husband is somewhat patiently waiting for me to come to bed and turn off the light. My life is good.

From one lousy good cook to another...

I would rather spend my time cooking than doing anything else, but I'm lousy at being a good cook. I share all of my secrets, I can eat an entire box of Kraft dinner by myself, and I recently have attempted to cut carbs out of my diet. See what I mean? Cooks that are good at being good chuckle when guests ask for a recipe, eat only great food, and would never, EVER in a million years dream about cutting carbs.

So in the spirit of being a crappy good cook, here's my new updated, slightly healthier version of chocolate chip cookies. You can still eat them with ice cream and chocolate sauce...I won't tell.

CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES

1 cup butter, at room temperature

1 cup packed brown sugar

1/2 cup white sugar

1 egg

1 tsp vanilla

1 cup all-purpose flour

1 cup whole-wheat flour

1 tbsp ground flax seed

1/2 tsp coarse salt

1 tsp baking soda

1 tsp cinnamon

1 bag or 2 cups of chocolate chips

Bake at 350F for 10-13 minutes. You know how to put cookies together so I'm not going to give a play-by-play. However, here are some tips, which you probably already know as well but I'm going to write them down anyway.

1. Cream the butter for a good 5 minutes before adding the sugars.

2. Undercook the cookies ever so slightly, then let them cool on the sheet before transferring them to a cooling rack.

3. If you want to go even healthier, use lard or applesauce instead of butter, all whole-wheat flour instead of half-and-half, or all light brown sugar instead of using both white and brown. I haven't tried any of these yet, but I'm very curious to know how they'd turn out.

4. The cinnamon helps cover the taste of the flax seed. BTW, don't buy toasted flax seeds. I'm serious.

Good luck with the cookies, and if this is a recipe that you love share it with your friends in the spirit of being a lousy good cook.

Back in the saddle again...

Here's a basic recap of the last 7 months, the highs and lows, if you will.

Low: My nana died and I didn't get to say goodbye.

High: I got to spend an entire week with my siblings. Unprecedented.

Low: I found out I have a bunion, a sure sign of getting old and all that comes with it.

High: I had a 30 minute appointment in Chilliwack and got to spend a whole week with my mom. By myself. With no children. I almost passed out from all the free time.

Low: We miss our friends and our church.

High: God brought us new friends who willingly hang out several times a week without us driving them crazy. AND they haven't once referred to our kids as "great birth control".

Low: Christmas was quiet.

High: Christmas was quiet.

Low: I turned 30.

High: I finally know what I want to do with my life, which is apparently a symptom of turning 30 so...yeah.

Low: After several terrifying episodes, Xander has been diagnosed with epilepsy. Epilepsy with no cause, which is a high and low within itself.

High: Turns out God is good. And faithful. And He loves Xander even more than we do, which seems impossible, but is truer than true.

So now it's May 3rd. We have all been sick in varying stages for the last five weeks, but the end of that is in sight. The weather is beautiful, the snow is melting, we ate hot dogs roasted over a fire last night, a sure sign that this is the Dease Lake version of summer.

This is also our last year here. We debated, still debate, whether or not we should move early. Watching your husband perform chest compressions on your three-year-old changes you, your priorities, and your perspective. I still don't have a peace about moving, not quite yet anyway. We are planning - after all, we're planners, right Mom? - our life in Chilliwack knowing that the details will change but the big picture remains the same. Our home filled with life and love and laughter, our kids freaking us out on a daily basis, our future intact and secure in the knowledge that we are forever in the hands of God.